TURNING YOUR CHALLENGES IN TO GOLD: LESSONS FROM REVEAL YOURSELF WORKSHOP
So much got jammed in last week, I described it to someone as getting stuck on a treadmill at max speed haha hope your week was amazing and full! Could not have asked for a better end to the week than with my REVEAL Yourself workshop. I know that the novelty of seeing people crack the door open to see their highest potential, and begin to recognise the stories they've believed to be true about themselves will NEVER wear off. There is nothing like it in the world. In fact the deeper I get in to this line of work, the more in awe I am.
Yesterday was a completely new experience for me. For the first time in my life, I was able to truly feel a sense of achievement. Usually, I am a serial poller, professional overthinker and chronic perfectionist. No matter how 'well' I do, there is always something to be improved. Yesterday, for the first time, I didn't pick anything apart. Didn't want to improve anything. I was just happy how it was. In fact when I got home and was washing up the dishes from the workshop (yep, I'm a full service here! haha) I cried. Happy tears. Tears of joy. Tears of pride.
A huge part of me felt like I had arrived. Like an unspoken goal I had set for myself had been reached. Like what I imagine athletes feel when they cross the finish line in a marathon or something. “We did it.” - me to myself. That part of me that never gave up, that had to overcome an enormous amount of personal challenges, dark nights of the soul, self doubt & fear to become the woman to create & hold that space. That space that allowed the women who came, who also overcame what they had to to get in that room, and had the courage to face off with a part of themselves that had been blocking their highest potential and leave it there. I see these women, I feel these women, because I am these women.
As they all shared their biggest awareness at the end of the day, I was blown away - because they did that shit. They got in the room. They pushed past the resistance. They went deep within themselves and THEY saw the truth of who they were. Now they can continue the journey on remembering how truly incredible they are, and that ANYTHING is possible for them. I'm just BLESSED, selfishly, to be able to be witness to this and call it 'work'.
The reason yesterday was different, was because I finally allowed myself to celebrate what I had overcome and how far I had come, and I finally TRUSTED and believed in myself enough to just get out of the way and release myself from having to get it 'right'. In March 2017 I couldn't even stand up in front of a room of people without breaking out in to a heat rash, shaking and/or crying. A lot of work has gone in to what happened yesterday, and I think often we only see the RESULT of someones inner work (aka the confidence) and forget what they may have overcome to get there and assume it comes naturally to them. What I know for sure, is we all have our own shit we are working through. But when we can USE those challenges as leverage, we turn it in to gold rather than a road block.
You may not know what your next step is right now. You might be second guessing yourself. Whatever it is you've been through or are going through I promise you is shaping you in to the EXACT version of you that can hold your dreams - IF you choose to see it that way. Without what I have been through in my life, I would not be the woman I am today. I wouldn't have the strength, compassion, empathy or courage that makes me a killer coach/healer. We are shaped in the valley - not the mountain top. But that's what makes getting to the peak even sweeter.
One of the biggest themes that shows up in these rooms and with the women I work with - is the belief they can't do [fill in the blank], because they aren't enough. I know this journey all too well, because it WAS my journey. Something I encouraged in the workshop yesterday, and with all my clients is to start to CHALLENGE every belief, thought and story you of why you can't. Who told you you couldn't? Is that true? What would be possible and who would you be if you put that down, and started telling yourself you COULD? Up until now, your brain may have been trained to ONLY check for why you can't, so it's up to you to start providing evidence you CAN, and training it to look for what's possible.
Here's an exercise to start to get out of this loop:
1. What's the story you're telling yourself about why you CAN'T?
2. Write down every challenge or obstacle you've ever overcome - whether it be from heartbreak, financial hardship, job loss, accident...you name it. What did you learn from this? What have you gained as positive attributes? You have survived every one of your worst days. (yeah that's right, you absolute badass - celebrate that shit!). Now it's time to THRIVE.
3. At the top of a new page, write down your goal, or what you want to achieve. Then under it, write down everything that it would take to make it happen. What would you ACTUALLY need to do? What would you have to let go of to make space for that action?
4. What would the version of you who achieved it believe about themselves? What thoughts would they have on a daily basis? How would they feel about themselves? Get in the practice of starting to use these thoughts, reaffirm these beliefs.
5. Take one step in the next 24 hours on the list you created of what you would need to do to make it happen. One baby step, that builds that trust, builds that confidence within you and starts to build that portfolio of proof you CAN and WILL.
I went to a conference last Thursday, and the biggest gem of the day was from Gary Vee who said "When your framework is selfless, it's easy. When it's selfless, its easy." Still in doubt? Don't make it about you - what can you GIVE from what you have learned? How can you make a contribution in someone else's life today? Most importantly - have fun with it! Enjoy and celebrate your growth. Know with each action you're going to get better and better at this. Acknowledge the growth, the awareness. Know that every obstacle has been a blessing - because it has led you exactly where you are meant to be and provided greater growth, aliveness and strength. You are enough. You have got this. Your inner guidance will never steer you wrong, you're on track. If you need support, reply to this email. I believe in you. xo
Want to go deeper?
Read: Girl, Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis
Watch: Lauryn Hill dropping major life wisdom to kids back in 2000 about embracing the valley.
Listen: The latest episode of The Ground Up with Kellie Scott on the power of acceptance.
Do: The exercise above - challenge everything.
Meditate: My guided empowerment visualisation
IMAGE CREDIT: THE SOUL ECHO